The year of Change

My fucking computer had been on the fritz. Unfortunately. But I finally have had a moment between the new job, having two twin one year old living with me, buying a new condo, talking to my Dad every night on the phone..... running around to dinner parties, yoga, meeting my real estate agent, and being eternally frustrated with my room mate and her take over of my life. It has been insane. I haven't had a minute to myself. Or at least that is what I feel like. I think if my offer is accepted I will be moving relatively soon. I love living in my place right now. It has everything I think I want but at the same time I am nervous. The year of changes. I lost the love of my life this year. I lost my chance at having his baby and maybe having a baby period. I changed jobs. I changed room mates. I have not had a lot of consistency. The question is do I really need consistency? Maybe all these changes are getting me to the life I dream of. The family with the husband and kids and the dog and the daily happiness. That is what I really want but as I continue to grow this year I wonder if my path is getting further away from those things I want. I have become less and less interested in dating as the year has gone by. I loved D so much and I just feel like I haven't had the closure I really needed to move on from that relationship. So what am I going to do? I kind of want to call him and wish that there was an answer.