My Fake BIRTHDAY

Today is my fake birthday. D christened today my fake birthday years ago. We always celebrate with cake, and sometimes roses. Always birthday sex. Always an extra effort made on this day for me. So in response to that I took a beer into the shower today and cried my eyes out. I cried for all the I have lost. And all that I thought I had. And all that I will never have again. For the man who I loved who thought I was worth two birthdays a year. For the man who doesn't exist anymore. I really loved him. I think he loved me too. Life just got in the way. Maybe he was never the man for me, but part of me believes that he is my person. Out there without me. Today I am utterly heartbroken.