Reminding myself of the OK moments

In the spirit of honestly blogging my heartbreak I have to admit that today I told my therapist that I don't want him back. I meant it in the moment. I might have even meant it all day. So it was what was in my heart when I spoke it. With this being said I can easily recognize the girl who wishes him back all the time. Since my road trip though I have had more moments of OKness. Moments where I feel empowered or capable of moving on and living a full and happy life. I think that the main thing to take from this is that I am OK for moments in time. I need to remember this when I have weeks like the last one where I feel like all the pain has come rushing back and I cannot live without him. I can live without him and there are some moments that are even great. Like last night's cooking classes, or going out dancing with girlfriends. I need to keep that in mind when I have set backs. Rome was not built in a day. It has taken five years to fall this deeply in love with him and it might take some time to heal from that.